new york city, month 1: just a few things

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this was going to be a fluffy list of 10 things i've learned since moving here. instead i'm just going to be v honest about the ups and downs so far, because we all go through those.

day to day life is an emotional rollercoaster, but i'm constantly reminding myself that i'm building an entirely new life, and that it's not gonna come together in a few days or weeks or months. it has been really hard. brutally hard. i was ready for the crowds, and the expenses, and public transportation. i wasn't afraid to change my life. i was aching for change. i just didn't realize how heavy it would be to learn a new city, not to mention having the freedom to choose a new life. i wasn't prepared for how it would overwhelm me and paralyze me. since the #bombcyclone (lol why that name, though??) last thursday, i hadn't been out of the apartment since wednesday. i will never do that again, if i can help it. 5 days later, i'm out, at a coffee shop and writing! so progress! anywhere i can feel like myself feels like a soft place to land, and that's what's holding me together these days. between meeting new friends and having amazing experiences, i'm spending days on end alone, so i try to do things that make me feel like myself, as often as possible. 

a few days before christmas i let myself be free for a day, and just photographed places--some familiar, some unfamiliar. it felt so good. i just needed the reminder.

my iso was too high when i took these. oops. i didn't realize it until it was tragically too late. (thanks for walking me through that, kait!) so blah blah blah it's hard to be a person, but i'm excited for when i'll be able to feel some ownership here. i'm also just holding out for any weather above 32ยบ. (i know i decided to move here in winter. don't throw it in my face.)

now. here are 10 wonderful things that have happened/i've realized since i've been here:

i bought these dr. marten boots and it's one of the best decisions i've ever made in my life! 

people in new york are amazing. don't let anyone tell you any different. they are all too willing to help you out, because at the end of the day everyone is just trying to survive and live their best life. i was swiping my metro card one day and it didn't work, and the guy behind me so patiently said, "you're doing it too fast...try it slower. there ya go." what an ANGEL. i am impatient af with anything that holds me up, so the fact that he did that warmed my heart, to no end. 

i've rediscovered my love for the show, frasier. i grew up watching it, so it feels like home to me! aka i've been watching a lot of it.  i've also realized how important and beautiful niles and daphne's story is. guys, it's SO beautiful.  niles crane is my favorite character/in some ways my dream man

i met a new aussie friend from bumble bff for coffee! she is warm and fun and laid-back and gives me hope for making friends in the city! she lives down the street from sarah jessica parker and told me about taking secret pics of celebs in her yoga class. aka we are kindred spirits. (bumble bff > bumble)

my angel of a friend, erin has opened her home to me, and i owe her everything. she's the perfect roomie for this transition in my life and i don't know what i'd do without her! i love ya, rooms. 

if nothing else, most days i'm just thrilled to be sharing the same air as the million celebs that live here. also, binging with babish, my other dream man.

i was not prepared for how much i would miss my parents, especially around christmastime. thank God for friends who take you into their cozy christmas eve/christmas! (lookin' at you, hannah faye and patrick!) i'll never forget this past christmas. they seriously saved me, and are part of my community here.  

i've learned the true value of bringing a portable charger, everywhere i go. i forgot mine today and i'm in a slight panic about it. in the event you're getting a drink with a friend and your phone is dead, ask the bartender if you can charge your phone behind the bar! most of the time they won't say no, so just do it bc life is short. (thanks for the tip, leslie!) 

on new year's eve i had a perfectly ironic night in, watching movies and ordering artichoke basille, just a few minutes after ringing in the new year. praise the lamb for pizza joints open till 3:30 am. 

the other night, after not sleeping a wink the night before, i decided to go to bed early. the upstairs neighbors were having a birthday party but it was winding down. as soon as i sat down on my bed i hear an accordion warming up. excuse me......? of course this was happening the night i decide to be semi-responsible with my sleep habits. but after a while i had to restrain myself from running up the stairs and asking to join them! it was the most beautiful, most nyc thing that's happened to me so far...straight out of a mari andrew illustration.

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